We rarely get to practice for any types of emergency, (unless you live in my house where it’s S.O.P) and it is a lack of knowledge that makes the thought of being caught up in something scary, that much more daunting. Unfortunately, for most people, that can induce some terrible symptoms in regards to the disease, “medenial”.

This is a very serious medical condition with far reaching ramifications. If you suffer from any of the following symptoms, please consult with me immediately about reserving your place at my next seminar:

1       That will never happen to me.

2       I’d never be able to do that.

3       Someone would never do that to another person.

4       I’d just give up and die.

5       Will someone else please help me deal with this?

6       I would never take that sort of responsibility for myself.

7       This IS someone else’s responsibility.

And by far my favorite:

8       I can’t handle this new reality – so I’m just going to freeze/panic/hide under a blanket or a combination of all three!

Of course the condition known as “medenial” should actually be written as “me-in- denial” and more accurately interprets like this,

“I am in complete denial about lots of things, that way I can pretend that nothing bad will ever happen to me, until of course it does, because it has to happen to someone as those are the times we live in, and then I can blame everyone but myself for not being rescued quickly enough.”

Fear of the unknown is completely reasonable. That’s normal. What’s not normal, is wandering around thinking nothing bad will ever happen, just because for 99% of your day, nothing bad has happened. In fact, this state of mind is so completely normal there’s a term for it in psychiatry, it’s called “normalcy bias”.

It is during a time when something bad does happen, something that breaks the mold on normal for your brain that you freeze. This momentary lapse in reasoning is due in part to the fact that your brain hasn’t had to consider, “what would you do if” – since you were a kid.

This “what if” game should still be a staple of our daily lives now, because the very consideration that you may at some point encounter circumstances beyond your normal range, or control, means you are no longer living with the disease, “medenial”.

The time frame inherent in your response to a specific danger might be cut down to a mere fraction of what it would have been without this line of thinking.

Fast decisions make for faster plans of action. Fast action saves lives; namely yours. Continually testing the parameters of your own abilities, both mentally and physically, trains you to look at even the most impossible circumstance or disaster and tell yourself, I’ll figure it out. I will cope. I will LIVE!

I’m guessing most of you think getting out of zip-ties would be pretty easy. It’s not.

In fact it’s downright scary. So are a plethora of other events that might befall you in your lifetime. You can’t consider them all, can you?

Do I really expect you plan contingencies for every possible scenario?? No.

But I would like you to use some basic information to formulate a plan around the most likely incidents you are most likely to encounter, and that is what we shall cover tomorrow!

See you back here then, cheers!

Self-defense & Situational Awareness Seminars in your area soon.

...everybody was kung fu fighting...those kicks were fast as lightening..

Hello mates

– we are nearly half way through the week now and you should be feeling like you’re winning…. At least I hope you do…

We are going to pick up from where we left off Monday discussing, “your line in the sand.”

I have trained lots of people over the years in self defense and more importantly to me, situational awareness, and three things have been evident in nearly every client I’ve had:

1   Women typically need a very justifiable reason for going all,* “Annie Wilkes” on someone’s ass!

2   Nearly every guy I’ve ever met thinks he can fight and hold their own in a fight, but unfortunately this is rarely the case. Unless they still train in some form of reality based martial art, they have little actual ability to defend themselves, regardless of how well they used to fight 5,10, or 20 years ago….

3  Those folks that think they want to learn how to kick box invariably have a change of heart after the first time they get kicked in the thigh, Muay Thai style, or punched in the face.

In reality, there is rarely a good reason to fight. And sitting here all calm and secluded in my office, I feel very self-righteous in my capacity to say so. Haha.

But you are getting that advice from a guy who once locked himself in a small room with two building contractors who had decided threatening me over the Nextel radio seemed like a good idea.

After a brief discussion and meeting of the minds, they decided not to do that again. Nothing violent occurred. Nothing violent had to occur… The simple realization that they had been led into the smallest room I could find, and then locked in with me, indicated one of two things:

1   I was completely crazy – there were after all two of them.

2   Or, I knew exactly what I was doing and felt more than capable of dealing with the problem if they chose to pursue their implied course of action.

One simple truth is clear, many will bluster, posture, and even make a lot of noise as if they feel inclined to fight; few will want to actually go through with it.

They are just hoping you want to do it less than they do?!

In this case all’s well that ends well. Both men decided that no matter which category I fell into, if I was inclined to lock the three of us in a small room while we had a chat, that was good enough for them – it was time for them to wind their neck in.

I never had another issue with either of them.

When it comes to training someone for the cage, there really are only two sets of guidelines to consider:

1   Both protagonists are there by choice.

2   And it is a sporting event – theoretically, this means no one is fighting to the       death.

The same thing cannot be said for self-defense.

1   In most cases of self-defense at least one person was completely blindsided by the attack.

2   There is no “warm up” period where you get to practice your moves pre-event, or get coached about what your strategy should be when, “attacked.”

3   Depending on your reaction speed, skill level, fitness level, mindset and available “tools” you might be fighting quite literally for your life.

4   Everyone has a preconceived notion of how fit they are. Some of you probably know how fit you are: Most are clueless, which leads to over optimism in regards to their performance potential. Fighting results in total body exhaustion within seconds; you might endure thirty seconds of a flat out ball busting brawl, if you are lucky.

Now, when I say total exhaustion, I don’t mean the kind of winded or tired you may experience from running up two flights of stairs at work because the elevator is broken.

Yeah. You're ready to fight....

I’m talking about an inability to even lift your arms anymore. You may well throw up as your body seeks ways to ditch unwanted “weight” in the stomach, enabling you to run faster; as if you were capable of running anywhere during or after such an encounter.

As blood is diverted from the digestive system to the large muscles to ‘fight off’ the challenge, stomach and intestines may empty their contents in order to prepare the body for quick action. This leads to a feeling of nervousness, stomach upset, vomiting and diarrhea. These side effects of stress are caused as a result of severe challenging situations that require immediate response and last for a short period of time.

Sharing this information with you isn’t to put you off standing your ground, not by any means. In fact, I would like to achieve the opposite. I would like the information to serve as a guideline, for you, when you begin reviewing your thoughts on where you’d draw your own line in the sand.

There are a variety of possible physical repercussions when you encounter this level of stress, fear and anxiety. Knowing what your body will likely be feeling before, during and after such an event helps forewarn you mentally of what to expect. Your body can react much differently than you’d anticipate it would in these circumstances and without that advance knowledge, the fight can leave you before it is ever time to start throwing blows.

Next Blog, we will have a look at the different types of mindset you may encounter once you’ve drawn your line in the sand and the consequences of crossing paths with someone like that! How would you cope? What sort of martial arts training should you begin looking to participate in, if you have suddenly realized you wouldn’t have a clue what to do with a knowledgeable attacker.

Hell, your attacker doesn’t even need to be particularly good at fighting, he already has the upper hand because he’s been revving himself up getting ready for the encounter – you’ve been figuring out todays list of work problems you need to solve. Mentally, he’s prepped for the fight – you are not. This is why it’s so important to pick a “reality based” school that will teach you proper mindset, as well as physical conditioning and tactics.

Self-Defense and Situational Awareness Seminars are for everyone.

More to follow mates – see you next time.

Cheers, Terry.

P.S. * Annie Wilkes for those who can’t place the name, was the nut-job from the Stephen King movie “misery”.

www.highintensityteambuilding.com

As usual I started scouring around looking for funnies during the week and have collected the ones that made me titter, and that are re-printable here on my Blog. LOL.

And all we keep hearing is, "the youth of today.." Nothing wrong with 'em at all. Nothing.

This next quote was taken from one of my favourite apps ever, and they have a website if you wanna check it out for yourself: FMLife

Quote: “Today my boyfriend begged me not to break up with him. Not because he loved me, but because losing me would would mean losing me as a friend on Facebook, then losing me as a neighbor on Farmville, and thus dropping one skill level…” FML. – isn’t that beautiful? Hahahahaha.

Here’s some great surveillance camera footage of a 75year old woman beating a robber about the head during his hold up of a convenience store!

And for all you martial arts fans out there….this is freaking funny! So much for friendly slaps only during this game…hahaha

It’s a toolbox…no really, it is…I wouldn’t have watched it otherwise! Promise.

This following link is to a selection of photos for “wingmen” that went well above and beyond the call of duty!!! Some of these pictures are stomach churningly good.

Momma always said, look both ways.....

Medications can only help so much...

Another link to the best vandalism shots in history. Who says crime isn’t funny? 

 Jk: Two men go bear hunting.

While one stays in the cabin taking a nap, the other gets bored and goes out to start looking for bears alone.

He finds a huge male bear and takes a shot. He realizes he has only wounded it and not killed it, when the bear roars in his direction and begins racing towards him.

The man panics, and takes off running back towards the cabin. He’s fast, but the bear is faster, even though it’s wounded.

Feet from the cabin door the man trips and falls flat on his face. The bear, moving much too quickly to stop, trips on the fallen man and rolls right over him, through the door and into the cabin.

The fallen hunter quickly jumps back to his feet, and slams the door shut behind the bear. Shouting from outside the cabin into his friend his says,

“You start skinning this one, and I’ll go get us another…..”

Please don't fondle the art work!

Apparently there has been marked decrease in suicide bombers since Susan Boyle made it onto Idol and announced she’s still a virgin….

 Something about discovering what they might look like must have put the terrorists off “martyring” themselves….

Can’t imagine why?

Hope you guys have a lovely weekend and we’ll get back to it again next week.

Cheers, Terry.

P.S. My fighter Sebastian is fighting again tonight, so I’ll drop a line in here on Monday about how he did.

Hope you’re doing well and week has been kind to you so far…and if not kind, I at least hope the drinking is helping blur the pain…LOL.

Don't let the healthy apple munching fool you - she was drunk as a skunk last night...

Let’s carry on from Monday.

Now, if you miraculously find yourself surrounded by people who seem like down to earth realists, well motivated and capable of listening first and talking second, thank your lucky stars and by all means press on with dishing your advice.

But first remember this: If I happened to be amongst your group, the first thing I would want to know is whether anyone else has any experience in anything even remotely related to the current set of circumstances.

You have a vast array of knowledge – But do not assume you are the most knowledgeable!

No matter how accomplished you are, there is always someone with either more knowledge, or better perspective, or just a different perspective than yours. Ignore them at your peril.

Sharing everyone’s ideas also means sharing the responsibility. If one person steps into the leading role, oblivious to others suggestions and gets it wrong – well, things are going to get ugly.

If, on the other hand, the entire group voted on a particular action and it backfires, that’s spreading the love.

An NCO I worked with in the Commandos would habitually repeat the following mantra as if lives depended upon it, turns out he was right:

“Teamwork is essential. It gives them someone else to shoot at.”

Now, if that isn’t spreading the love, I’m not sure what is. A group that is consulted and made to be a part of the process, in this case trying to survive, will feel a greater sense of personal responsibility for the whole – not just themselves.

When one person starts rattling off orders and blindly expecting people to follow, things can begin to turn unpleasant in a hurry.

I reckon she's taking this walking on water thing too seriously...plus she's cheating.

If you think people should follow you on blind faith, simply because you think you are perfect, then you should try walking on water sometime.

If you can accomplish that task, then maybe people will step in-line and follow on nothing more than your say-so! If not, you better be able to explain why you think things should be done the way you are telling them.

Right now I’m coaching an MMA fighter, Sebastian Wojdak, and the guy has skills. He picks new things up fast, which can only be to his benefit, especially when not listening can get your head pounded by your opponent.

But beyond all of his natural talent and desire to be the best fighter possible, he has another gift: He is relatively humble.

Why is this important in a mixed martial arts fighter? Because on any given day you can, and will, lose a fight. The other guy may not necessarily be a better fighter than you, at least on paper. But a lucky shot hurts just as much as a skilled shot.

Humility means that on such a day, your fall isn’t quite as far. The crowd won’t necessarily want to see you pounded to within an inch of your life. Believe me this is of huge importance when it’s time to get back into the arena and try again.

Being humble allows you the freedom to say, after the fact, wow, I screwed up, he was better on the day and now I’ll train harder and come back more prepared. Thanks to everyone that has supported me…

You should never underestimate how tough things can be psychologically after that sort of a loss.  Humility will lend itself to receiving a great deal more support from people around you after such an event, versus having to contend with the trauma alone.

Life and death decisions with a group of strangers will amount to the same thing.

Orders will be construed as arrogance. Suggestions will be embraced as guidance.

Even more importantly, suggestions are viewed as the starting point for conversations. Conversations lend themselves to bonding and feeling a part of the process. No one starts to feel like a mushroom.*

If you make a suggestion and it turns out you are wrong, guess what, it was only a suggestion. We don’t typically feel the need to defend ourselves nearly as strongly when we have merely made a suggestion.

Now, if you give that same person an order and they don’t follow it, maybe because they know you are wrong….watch how vehemently you will defend your line in the sand.

Now you’ve made an enemy. And in a survival situation you don’t need enemies, you need allies.

The situation you are all in is enemy enough for all of you without creating unnecessary conflict; which brings me back to my original point – if you have observed the group diligently from the beginning, and decided they are a good group and well worth hanging with, this shouldn’t be so difficult.

If it turns out that you were wrong in your initial assessment and they are a bunch of plonkers, now would be the time to run, not walk away.

Walk, run, or even fly away when the group seems hell bent on doing the wrong thing.

You must not fear being alone. Sometimes being alone is the only way to survive.

I recommend reading this short account of plane crash survivor Juliane Koepcke - http://www.cnn.com/2009/WORLD/europe/07/02/germany.aircrash.survivor/index.html

All of this pre-thought and consideration will go a long way to easing the impact on you mentally, should such an event occur. If you have never considered the problems you might have to face in an emergency, at least beyond the fleeting, “I hope that never happens to me” reasoning – you could end up being one of those people sitting on their ass just giving up and dying.

Bad things happen to good people all the time. It’s not personal; it’s just the way things are. Pre-emptive consideration of the possible challenges, decisions, and repercussions will afford you better control of your own emotions.

As Ralph Emerson once said, “What goes on around you, compares little to what goes on inside you.”

Next time, we’ll look at how tough do you think you are? And it’s probably tougher than you think. You’ve just never been pushed to your limit to find out how tough!

Keynote and motivational speaker

We’ll explore ways to improve your mental toughness before you ever really need the skills.

Cheers, Terry

It’s so nice to be back. I had the week from hell last week, but one that was the good kind of busy not the bad kind, I’m happy to report.

She's been so rushed she didn't even have time to find a belt for her pants. Now that's busy!

Several things were going on simultaneously and keeping all of those balls in the air was amazingly frustrating, and at the same time incredibly rewarding!

It seemed as if every single day last week ran like a freight train from start to finish…hours seemed to fly like minutes and not once did there seem to be enough of them in the day.

Still, that’s preferable to the alternative isn’t it? Hahaha!

We’ve already had a look at what your attitude should be in the worst of circumstances; a time when your careful appraisal of the group around you could mean the difference between life and death, namely your own.

If you have been able to remain calm enough to maintain a somewhat critical eye in regards to the remaining survivors, you will probably survive.

Staying calm in the first 60 minutes of a crisis sets a precedent for the duration of the adventure.

 Survival is a lot about how you view the challenge. It’s a bit like a game of golf: It’s really you against you! The second you start to view the circumstances as conspiring against you, you lose. You lose because you begin to fight those circumstances as if this whole thing is personal.

It’s not personal.

The ball doesn’t hook after you hit just to screw with you. The ball is an inanimate object, indifferent to whether it goes straight or completely backwards. It travels in the direction that you hit it.

One small misaligned strike and that thing is going into the bunker, or the water, or those trees over there.

This is why calm heads prevail in survival. It’s not the big things you do. It’s the small decisions that begin adding up. Over the course of your extraordinary day, days, weeks, or even months, each decision will impact the chances of your living or dying.

There's laid back, and then there's laid out. Your guess which category he's in.

Now, as if this wasn’t bad enough, add in a few other souls in need of saving, and you can begin to see why your choice to try and save everyone becomes extremely complicated: Their choices can begin to impact your “course”.

It’s like lining up to take that important golf shot and having someone else’s hand pressing on your shoulder as you begin to swing. It might not throw you off completely, but it sure as hell won’t be the shot you were capable of making alone.

Throughout this piece I’ve been playing devil’s advocate. Many might think that keeping the group at arm’s length is wrong. That if you have the necessary “know-how” to help save the group, then you should step up to the plate and fill the role.

I’m not saying don’t step up at all costs and avoid the responsibility, no matter what.

I’m saying remain calm enough to assess whether the group will listen to what you have to say first, before committing.

It is a huge responsibility and once you have made it clear you have the know-how once, people will expect you to have the answers to all of their problems. And you won’t… You will be on the hook until the adventure ends.

Generally people will hand over responsibility for their lives much too readily. It’s part of our society and psychological makeup that keeps people from walking out in the snow to meet the Paramedics, when their truck gets stuck in the snow.

Rescue, when it comes, might not be so welcome....

They would rather lay there and die, blaming someone else for not coming to their rescue, than get off their ass and do it for themselves.

You see, when seconds count, rescue is only minutes away…

By all means get mad about who didn’t do their job after the fact. But if you face some sort of crisis, it seems prudent to do all YOU can to save yourself first.

If you find yourself surrounded by a bunch of folk’s hell bent on blaming what’s happened to them on everyone around them, there’s a good chance you will become the target of their frustration shortly after beginning to help them, too.

It isn’t necessarily that what you will be doing isn’t helping them, it’s just you are now a convenient target for their own impotencies. It really is a shit load easier to blame someone else for not having come to their rescue than take on the task of trying to save themselves.

People fear death nearly as much as mandatory visits to the Dentist. But death isn’t the worst thing that can happen to you – lifelong debilitating injuries can be somewhat of a drag too.

This is especially true if you earned the injury saving some ass-hole who later turns around and sues you for your trouble. Make sure the person you are attempting to save is worth it. The only way you can be sure is by quietly assessing each person in the group and listening to what they have to say.

Complainers and negative Nellie’s are well worth steering clear of. They can find their own way back to the world – in fact its better that they do.

If they don’t make it back to civilization that’s just one less democrat here in the real world complaining about the help they still aren’t receiving… Ooops. Was that my outside voice?

After dinner and keynote speaker.

What if you find yourself in the perfect group; well grounded, motivated, realists, optimists. Dare I say just a group of ”non-complainers!” Well, then my friend, you have struck pay dirt. Embrace it and begin your survival journey in good company.

We’ll pick up on this topic again and look at the other questions from, “It’s time for them to die.”

Cheers, Terry.