It’s time to let them die…
By
admin
|
Published
March 11, 2010
 This is probably what I'll look like right before wandering off into the bush... Hello mates!
Top-of-the-morning-to-ya.
Most of us are brought up to believe in humanity, in the same way as we are brought up to differentiate between right and wrong. Morality is important throughout our society. We are expected to want to rescue, help and save everyone, as if everyone was really worth saving…
Television shows reinforce this standard by highlighting the struggle between personality types during a crisis – it helps heighten the drama and thus the, “watch-ability” factor. The “good-guy” fights to save the rest. He struggles to convince the, “group” he has a plan, that he can get them all out safely…What a load of crap.
And what a waste of energy!
If you want to survive, don’t go wasting your valuable mental and physical resources on folks hell bent on doing things their way. Just let them go. Or better yet, you go.
Survival will boil down to common sense and your ability to remain calm and rational. Others will not be so blessed. Their idea of common sense and rational thought may differ greatly from yours – in fact, I would hasten to add you should count on that being the case.
If you and I were in a survival situation it’s not my style to start barking orders at the group, in some misguided attempt to make everyone realize what they might be doing is wrong.
In fact you might be somewhat surprised in not hearing much from me at all.
I’m much more likely to make a few quiet suggestions, and see who’s listening. I want to see which of the group has retained their ability to still think clearly and weigh up all the options.
If it becomes apparent to me that none of the group has retained that ability, or perhaps the person with the loudest voice has decided to take charge and leads the group off in the wrong direction, you will not see me again. I’ll quietly wander off into the “bush” and take care of myself, but thanks all the same…
 Once you've made a decision, grow a couple and follow through; alone if need be. If you know what you are thinking is right, makes complete sense, gives you the best chance of survival and you haven’t heard anything from anyone else around you to challenge that idea, then have the balls to follow your instincts.
You will have insufficient resources and energy to fight and recruit people that have already chosen to align themselves with the loudest mouth in the group. So don’t try. This is your chance to prove Darwin’s Selection theory in real time. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Natural_selection
There is a scene in Gladiator, starring Russell Crowe, when he is about to be thrust into the Arena for the first time. The man in front of him begins urinating on himself in fear.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0172495/
“Maximus” takes a step back distancing himself from the guy as he anticipates things not ending well for that man. You should do the same, both figuratively and literally, if your group appears to have lost its collective minds.
There are those out there that will have little or no control over their emotions. They lack the mental toughness necessary to persevere and overcome the situation.
They will want someone to save them. They will not be capable of saving themselves. They will not begin their survival journey by saying the Survivors Creed,
“I will live in the moment. I will hope for nothing. Provide for myself everything. Roll with the punches when adversity strikes and things don’t go my way. I will laugh at every available opportunity. Rescue, should it arrive, will be just a welcome interruption in my survival journey – nothing more.” – Terry Vaughan.
We will look at rules three four and five over the next few days and as always, I welcome your comments, emails and suggestions!
Cheers, Terry.
Posted in Keynote Speaking, inspired, teambuilding
|
Tagged commando, community teambuilding, conflict, Darwin, Darwins selection theory, engaging speaker, example of public speaker, exciting speakers, flash mob, funny speakers, Gladiator, gladitorial arena, High Intensity Teambuilding, humanity, Keynote speaker, Maximus, mental toughness, motivational speakers, motivational speakers nc, Oprah, Public speaker, recruit new members, Russell Crowe, survival creed, survival philosophy, survival situation, T-mobile, team building, teambuilding, Terry Vaughan, your survival skills
|
It’s time to let them die?
By
admin
|
Published
March 8, 2010
 He wasn't struggling with his decision quite as much as he would have imagined... Or is it?
Hopefully, you will never have to face making the ultimate decision in the sort of situations we’re about to discuss, but if you did, you’d want to keep some things in mind
1 You can’t save everybody
2 Not everybody wants to be saved
3 Risking your own life needs to be measured very carefully; this is not just because of the risk of dying, but also because getting injured might mean not dying, and instead living out the remainder of your life with a debilitating injury.
4 Preparing yourself mentally before such an event, will go a long way towards minimizing the long term emotional affects making such a decision will have on you.
5 You are tougher, both mentally and physically, than you think you are; but if you can’t imagine yourself being strong or resilient in a true disaster, then you will likely be the one needing to be saved by someone that is – so toughen up before that ever happens!!
As reported (in part) to the Daily Telegraph – England:
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/features/3634463/Joe-Simpson-My-journey-back-into-the-void.html
Joe Simpson
Published: 12:01AM BST 22 Oct 2007
 It's all fun and games until someone get's hurt... Legendary climber Joe Simpson – who famously escaped death in the Andes – tells Peter Stanford of the doomed expedition that tempted him back up a mountain
Joe Simpson was just 14 when he read The White Spider, an epic account of efforts to conquer the North Face of the Eiger.
His first reaction, he recalls, was straightforward horror. Why, the schoolboy wondered, would anyone want to risk their life climbing mountains?
“The stories in the book were enough to put the willies up anyone,” says Simpson, the 46-year-old British mountaineer whose extraordinary tale of survival in the Andes was detailed in the book and 2003 film, Touching The Void.
“But then, when I thought about it, I kept coming back to the idea that these climbers were intelligent people and that there must be something really good to be had from mountaineering if they were prepared to take risks like that.”
Childhood reading marked the beginning of a love affair with mountains that comes full circle with The Beckoning Silence, a documentary being screened on Channel 4 tonight.
In 1985, 11 years after reading the book, Simpson and his climbing partner, Simon Yates, made the first ascent of the west face of Siula Grande in the Peruvian Andes.
 Eventually one of them would have to leave the safety of the group and risk getting a sweater On the way down, things went badly wrong. Simpson, with a broken leg, ended up dangling helplessly on a rope over a crevasse the depth and scale of the dome of St Paul’s Cathedral. Yates, believing him dead, cut the rope.
“At this stage,” Joe says, “I was wishing to God I had listened to my first reaction at 14…..”
After cutting the rope and beginning his own self rescue, Simon (Joe’s climbing partner) had to contend with the guilt of knowing that if his climbing partner wasn’t dead, he had nearly certainly killed him when he cut the rope.
Of course, Joe wasn’t dead and managed to crawl, limp, stagger and generally fight his way back to base camp over the next several days. His miraculous arrival occurred hours before Simon was due to leave camp and head back to civilization.
It’s a great book, and if you want more information about it follow this link – the brief synopsis you read will probably seal the deal!
We will be looking into the first five rules in regards to making these types of tough life and death choices over the next few days, and hopefully giving you food for thought in case you are ever called upon to make such a decision.
Cheers, Terry.
Posted in Keynote Speaking, inspired, teambuilding
|
Tagged charlotte speakers, commando, community team building, engaging speaker, enthusiasm, exciting speakers, funny speakers, Joe Simpson, Keynote speaker, life and death, motivational speakers, motivational speakers nc, Peter Stanford, Public speaker, Simon Yates, St Pauls Cathedral, Terry Vaughan, Terry Vaughn, Touching the Void
|
The three rules for being mentally tough!
By
admin
|
Published
March 1, 2010
 Hello again mates and welcome to a brand new week. 
Mentally tough isn’t necessarily about developing the inner Special Forces soldier in you – although that kind of mentality is certainly tough: It’s about finding a way to make the most of everyday no matter what misfortune transpires!
One sure fire way to get you mental game off on the right foot, is visualization: In other words, your future becomes your focus. But, if you think that alone will ward off the evil spirits, Murphy’s law, or whatever other “bad” luck you’ve got heading your way, think again!
Mentally tough really boils down to these three practical things and not necessarily in this order either:
Be prepared – expect the unexpected.
Don’t start feeling sorry for yourself – no matter what.
Cracking a joke at your own expense, first – then consider how you’re going to deal with the problem at hand.
The toughest one of these is usually the, “expect the unexpected” – followed by, “not feeling sorry for yourself,” and then finding the humor in your situation.
We are going to look at, “Not feeling sorry for yourself” – first.
Steven Callahan wrote a book aptly titled, Adrift about his 76 days at sea, after his home made boat was destroyed during a solo voyage around the world. Half his survival equipment didn’t make it onto the emergency rubber raft after the accident, and he was only half dressed!
He talked in detail about the emotions that threatened to destroy his mindset during his adventure. More importantly he revealed that the choices he had made, like walking away from the security of society in order to pursue his dreams of sailing, were at the root of why refused to feel too sorry for himself.
He knew he had made choices that had led him up to this point in his life. The things that seemed to conspire against him as the days in his tenuous rubber raft gave way to weeks, he did his best to remind himself that giving up and dying wasn’t an option.
Believe me, after reading his account of things, it would be hard not to seriously think about throwing in the towel…
Most of us in our lifetime don’t get 76 days alone – let alone consecutively, and although there are times when 76 days alone anywhere, including the ocean, might appeal to us, the reality is we’d be scared silly.
How would you cope?
At the heart of every survival story is the million dollar question we ask about ourselves, would I survive that?
 The truth is, if you struggle to get through a regular working day, constantly letting the problems of the day get the better of you, then the chances are you’d become just another statistic if something transpired out of the ordinary.
Our focus goes askew when things drift outside the “vision” we had for the day. It’s not that we are mentally weak, although in some cases that also applies, it’s more that we tend to focus on who’s to blame rather than whether we can fix it.
Our energy is quickly converted into anger or frustration about what has happened, instead of focusing on how to best deal with it. We let loose the voice in our heads that screams this wasn’t your fault; once again it’s just bad luck piling up.
It has nothing to do with luck, good or bad. Things just happen. You are lost in the wilderness and it begins to pour with rain. It was going to rain any way, Mother Nature hasn’t decided to play some cruel joke on you just for grins.
Mother Nature is coldly indifferent to whether you live, or die. She doesn’t care. She certainly doesn’t feel sorry for you – and neither should you!
Wasting your energy feeling sorry for “poor little old you” doesn’t help anything. Instead, you should immediately look around to see what you have at hand that can be used to improve your situation. Nearly everything in life can be used for more than just its original purpose, it just takes imagination in order to fathom how.
 That’s where your energy should be directed. Self pity is a wasteful occupation; as is sitting and waiting for someone else to come and rescue you.
Which brings us to, “expect the unexpected” …Or at least it will tomorrow!
I’m off to attend a Toastmasters meeting now and will pick up with this again tomorrow.
Cheers, Terry
www.highintensityteambuilding.com
Posted in Keynote Speaking, inspired, teambuilding
|
Tagged adrift, being adrift, charlotte speakers, commando, community team building, community teambuilding, energetic, engaging speaker, example of public speaker, exciting speakers, funny speakers, Keynote speaker, mental toughness, Oprah, Public speaker, public speaking, steven callahan, Terry Vaughan, Terry Vaughn
|
Why the hell would I want to be mentally tough anyway?
By
admin
|
Published
February 23, 2010
Because, frankly, if you aren’t, life can royally suck…
 And life isn’t supposed to suck: At least not all the time. It’s supposed to suck from time to time, but you should always manage to bounce back, better and stronger than ever – and that’s why being mentally tough is so important!
Developing mental toughness sets you up to bounce back quicker than the competition after you both hit the proverbial wall!
Of course, not everything is a competition, right?
It’s not as if we:
Have to fight for everything we get in life…
Struggle to keep ourselves running successful business’…
Battle to keep our kids safe and on the straight and narrow…
Juggle the sort of schedules heads of state would have marveled at 20 years ago…
All while eating healthily, exercising, volunteering our time to worthy causes and trying to get enough sleep so we don’t burn out before our next birthday..
Or is this just me?? LOL
Unfortunately, when we imagine someone mentally tough, we always seem to end up with some sort of Drill Sergeant Caricature, who doesn’t actually resemble anyone we’d ever want to emulate – or is it? Drill sargeants aren’t always grumpy you know, and tough love is still love after all…. 
So what’s the happy balance?
For me, it starts with exercise.
I stumbled across a neat and short Blog posting in reference to the whims of exercise and what the current training trends reflect right now – http://www.malepatternfitness.com/2010/2/9/1303157/fitness-circa-2010
Don’t worry about it saying male pattern anything, it’s more a segment about why training is going the way it currently is, and I must say I agree, but with an additional reason tacked on.
If trouble is ever going to find you, it’s going to require a relatively short, incredibly intense burst of activity on your part in order to facilitate, “fleeing” the scene, so-to-speak!
In very few instances will there be a need for you to lift a car engine sized weight above your head while admiring “witnesses” applaud your strength. But if you visit just about any Gold’s Gym, or equivalent, in the country, you’ll be sure to find a huge segment of the visiting clients training as if this were the case.
Steroids are rampant, heavier is always better, and wife beaters which allow full view of the male nipples are the fashion du jour. It would seem that very little emphasis is being placed on over-all maximum fitness. Ask one of these meat heads to run a few laps around the parking lot and their tanks will be empty before they get through the double doors exiting the building.
And yes, I know, running isn’t everyone’s cup of tea: Which is why exercise programs like Cross-fit are so popular. It is a great alternative to running in order to improve cardio vascular fitness.
This “new” training regime harkens back to a time when most exercise programs were practiced for combat only.
Fond memories litter my aging brain of training many of my clients using strategies like full body ranges of motion, and maximum effort, because it seemed to me that if the body moves that way in everyday life, we should train it that way.
 I’ve always believed that maximum effort was important because when you are in a pickle and flight isn’t an option, fighting is brutal, exhausting and messy. The combatant with the most resiliency was most likely to walk away – or more likely stagger away, but either way you’re leaving the scene.
But you aren’t going to walk, or stagger, any where if you haven’t put your body through its paces on a regular basis. This for me is where the mental toughness begins to come into play.
Conditioning yourself to get to the gym more than once in a blue moon is a great start. This alone takes discipline: which is the other part of the equation.
These days when most people get an ache or a pain, it’s off to the doc’s and get it looked at – stat!
I once had a kickboxing client who kicked me so hard he bruised his ankle. In contact sports, as in life, bruises are to be expected.
What’s not expected is the E.R. visit that followed because he was convinced he’d broken his leg…
He used the correct medical terminology for his injury upon seeing me next time, defending his visit to the E.R. with the colorful explanation that he’d sustained a contusion; which, by any other name, is a bruise.
Not particularly tough…
I know he wasn’t used to getting those types of bruises, or feeling that kind of pain, but when did you ever hear that life was supposed to be pain free???
It’s not. We have pain receptors for a reason. Sometimes, shit hurts. The good news is, if you’re feeling pain it means you aren’t dead yet, so suck it up and keep on trucking….
Regular training, especially intense challenge your whole body until it shakes, can’t catch your breath or feel your fingers kind of training, develops your pain threshold. It pushes the body to the limits.
Some days that might be ten minutes. And some days it might be 50. Either way, going to the gym or participating in a class environment that challenges your entire physiological make-up, begins the process of developing mental toughness.
Self-Discipline adds another facet to the equation. We’ll continue covering more on this subject over the next few days as this is so close to my heart. Plus I can’t wait to see what emails arrive from today’s post
 We’ll have a look at few folks who are shining examples of discipline personified and why it was so important for them be remain disciplined in order to save lives; their own and others.
Cheers, Terry.
www.highintensityteambuilding.com
Posted in Keynote Speaking, inspired, teambuilding
|
Tagged balancing family and professional lives, balancing life and work, beating your demons, beating yourself, being stronger than ever, bouncing back, bouncing back after heart break, broken heart, competative toughness, competition, Cross-fit, dominant woman, dominatrix, eating healthy, energetic, engaging speaker, example of public speaker, exciting speakers, functional training, funny speakers, getting the right exercise, GOld's gym, keeping kids safe, Keynote speaker, life shouldn't suck, life sucks, making a better life, meat heads, motivational speakers, motivational speakers nc, Public speaker, public speaking, running a business, steroids, time management, tough love, training for combat
|
Karaoke anyone?? It will help your decision making under pressure….
By
admin
|
Published
February 22, 2010
Developing mental toughness and staying cool under pressure.
Today we are going to start with the last part first, before going onto the first part last, beginning tomorrow… You following me? Hahaha! 
Does being mentally tough just come down to genes?
Is it just a case of you are whatever yo’ momma gave ya, and that’s it?
I don’t think so!
I want you to imagine a simple scenario: You are out on the town with a group of friends and the first place you guys happen to stop in has a Karaoke machine.
You aren’t drunk yet, not by a long shot! Do you go up and start singing??
You should: But not immediately. First you should sit for at least 15 minutes contemplating going on stage and singing. I want you to think about which song you’ll perform. I want you to think about all those people watching you up there alone, most of them are drunk, and there might even be some heckling after you get going.
They might hate your singing ability!
But you should go up any way, and today’s Blog is about why…
For years it was thought that our brains couldn’t develop more “mass” once we left childhood behind. The latest research has blown that theory well out of the water and this is good news.
When it comes to making decisions under pressure, you can train yourself to make a choice quicker, by keeping your new life experiences quota up.
Why? Because more life experiences, particularly exhilarating or frightening ones, help our brain mapping, and neuroplasticity occurs…. New experiences mean faster cognitive abilities when circumstances demand it.
 Going up on stage to sing Karaoke, sober, would qualify as a new and exhilarating experience for most of us, and this is a good thing. For most of us public speaking, or even better, sober public singing, would be cause for great amounts of panicking.
The brain loves new challenges and revels in the chance to improve its own efficiency. It will lay down a new marker within itself and then, the next time you are forced to make a decision quickly, under pressure, it can run straight to the “marker” or file cabinet labeled, “Holy shit, I need to make a decision” – and do so faster than it did before.
It adapts faster to new and unexpected stimuli because it has new, “pathways” on which to travel.
We make decisions primarily based upon the totality of our own life experiences, the more varied and plentiful these are, the better we are equipped to handle unusual circumstances, threats, or scary encounters.
When we become complacent about life, or mentally sedentary, our brain starts going into cruise mode. Everything is pretty much, “normal” until suddenly it isn’t.
Then your brain effectively does a shoulder shrug and asks what the hell do you want from me? I’m not equipped to handle this; resulting in a freeze and a dumb looking facial expression.
This is exactly what happened to the doctor that attempted to intervene during that poor girls’ traffic accident I described last week. Theoretically he had the medical knowledge needed to help me with the incident. Unfortunately he lacked the stressful life experiences to keep him calm when it happened. He had no new, recent, mind mapped “flags” for his brain to fall back onto. His brain had to go way back to med school, or maybe even further back than that, for his brain to have a reference point from which to start the decision making process.
Basically he was out of practice when it came to doing things, “on the fly”. His capacity to improvise and remain calm in the face of all that stress was severely lacking. He may have been a Podiatrist for all I know. Or possibly when he yelled I’m a Doctor he failed to mention the whole story and he was a Doctor of Philosophy. Who knows!
I know that if a Dr. from one of the local E.R.s had of shown up, there wouldn’t have been any delay getting down to brass tacks. Even a nurse, or a cop, or a fireman, or Tiger Woods P.R. person, would have remained calmer than this guy!
My life, however, at that time was far from calm. I was still serving in the Commandos: An environment that prided itself on developing men that could stay calm under pressure.
After all, what good would you be running around firing blindly in all directions the first time things got a bit dicey?
 We were placed into deliberately stressful situations and made to think clearly…at least most of the time. There were always going to be moments when running around like a chicken with its head cut off would seem like a good choice, given all of the options…LOL.
So, in an age when doing anything, “risky” is viewed with varied levels of disdain, I want you to embark on a journey of adventure this coming year and you can attribute every “crazy” experience towards becoming a more effective person under pressure.
That covers the “decision making process” part of last week’s Blog, tomorrow we’ll take a look at the final part in this series, Mental Toughness, and whether you are or aren’t mentally tough.
 Cheers! Terry
www.highintensityteambuilding.com
More information about neuroplasticity on the following links:
http://www.headstrong.com.au/FAQ/~Q4-54/What_is_neuroplasticity
“Keeping your brain fit!” – follow the link below.
http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2008/02/04/usnews/main3787019.shtml
Posted in Keynote Speaking, inspired, teambuilding
|
Tagged better decisions, better decisions under stress, charlotte speakers, commando, community team building, community teambuilding, cool under pressure, energetic, engaging speaker, finger puppets, flash mob, flash mob dance, fun blog, funny blog, funny speakers, gothic, karaoke, Keynote speaker, keynote speakers nc, mascara, mental toughness, mind mapping, motivational speakers, motivational speakers nc, neuroplasticity, Public speaker, singing, Terry Vaughan, Terry Vaughn
|
|
|
